Monthly Archives: February 2012

A friend of mine was sharing that one of her most difficult struggles as a stay at home mom is having ”flashes of time” here and there to work on something–and so little gets accomplished in a day.  I have to say I sometimes miss the days when you start a project and see it through to the end.

So much of our housework and upkeep in our homes is not really cleaning.  I’m not referring to the type of cleaning such as organizing a cluttered closet or admiring a bathroom that smells like lemon fresh Pine Sol.  I am thinking about the time my two year old got into the Zip Loc baggie drawer and proceeded to put 150 zip loc bags behind the couch and stuffed little toys inside of twenty seven of them.  That to me is not the same as cleaning or “de-cluttering.”  It is more like “undoing the chaos.”  I feel like this is the type of “cleaning” I do the most.

Honestly sometimes I look around the house and don’t even know where to start.  So I resort to not starting anything…and wasting time on facebook.

If I have learned anything over the last few months, it would be the following.

1.  Sometimes it is OK to throw out the laundry schedule and the cleaning to-do list.  There are chaotic weeks, even months where a rigid schedule does not work.  I feel like I am set up to fail.  Do the bare minimum.  Survive.  It won’t be like this forever.

2.  Don’t turn down help.  I’ve had offers to clean my bathrooms, watch my kids, and bring hot meals.  I don’t turn those down.  I need all the help I can get.  Someday I will be in more of a place that I can return those favors to someone else.

3.  Take care of you!  Get a full night’s sleep (I realize it’s broken sleep if you have a baby).  If your older kids are getting you up all night, they aren’t sleeping well.  And neither are you.  Sleep deprivation just adds to the chaos.  Eat healthy.  Exercise.  Read a good book about something other than parenting.

Right now all we have is “flashes of time.”  It’s overly frustrating.  Every morning I wake up and say, “What can I realistically accomplish today?”  I am blessed if I can conquer at least half of it.

Posted by artoornstra in Uncategorized

The following was written by Kristin Buursma, regular contributor to Everyday Mom.  I thought this was a perfect baby shower idea.  Or a Mother’s Day idea.  One Mother’s Day I sent a card to a new mom and thought, “This a nice way to welcome her to mommyhood.  I should do this more often!”

Recently, I was reading a reference letter that my husband had written for a former co-worker.  While reading, I realized how much I love reference letters. They are so positive, so upbeat and do a great job of bragging about all the skills this person has.

I found myself wishing that someone would write a reference letter for me. Who wouldn’t love to read someone’s opinions of all the great skills and abilities that they have?  Why don’t moms have or need reference letters?  And then I realized, why not? Why not write a reference letter for a friend to let them know how much you admire their skills as a parent or why not write a reference letter for a new mom and give it to her at the baby shower.  Both long-term moms and newbies will both appreciate a boost to their self-esteem as a parent. (And perhaps this will fulfill some inner-blogger/writer desires that we all seem to have.)

Here’s an example I would write for a new mom. Perhaps it could be fun to address it to the new baby to let them know they are in good hands.

Dear baby,
I have known your mom for a long time. The first thing I remember about her was her willingness to watch my favorite tv show and discuss in detail the characters and story lines. She was so quick to jump in and enjoy the moment.  I think you and your mom are going to have some great movie nights!

Beyond her fun personality, your mom was always someone who seemed to know how to do lots of stuff and if she didn’t know, she was going to be figure it out. She’s taught herself how to knit and crochet beautiful things and she would come to group parties with delicious breads and goodies that she just “whipped up”. (Ask her about her flavored rice krispie treats when you have teeth – they are delicious.) In a different skill-set, I think she even learned how to change the oil in her car. Baby, I promise you that you are going to have great craft and cooking times with your mom and you might even get to help change the oil in your car.

Always ready for an adventure, your mom has gone snowboarding, kayaking, hiking, camping and more.  Get ready, kiddo – your life is not going to spent sitting around wondering what to do.  Your mom has this amazing confidence and level-headedness that allows her to tackle brand new things and not be flustered if things don’t go her way the first time. She’s going to have some great tips about how to learn new things and go with the flow at the same time. Between your dad and your mom, you’re going to have plenty of adventures!
So, little one – I want to reassure you that you are in good hands. We can’t wait to meet you.

love, Kristin

PS – Almost forgot… but you’re mom’s really smart too. Don’t worry about getting help with school work when you’re older!! Her knowledge of computer stuff boggles my mind.

Posted by artoornstra in Uncategorized