Extroverted stay at home mom

My friend Amy is an introvert.  I (also Amy) tend to find deep friendship with introverts though I am about as strong as an extrovert as you can get.  I think I’ve always had a tremendous amount of respect for those who don’t need to be constantly around a circus of people.  Amy recently wrote about being an introvert on her blog.  Amy & I also read for Book Club:  Quiet:  The Power of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking.

Is it easier to be a stay at mom if you are an extrovert?  Don’t extroverts derive their energy from being around people?  Don’t we crave all the action? I’m a strong extrovert.  Would I not make a great candidate to be a mother of ten, stay at home with them all, and home school the whole crew?

Um…no.

True, we extroverts do get energized from being around people…sometimes large groups of people.  After coming home from going out with friends, it takes me a long time to wind down.  I usually have to read a book, watch a TV show, surf the Internet before I can go to bed.  

My idea of fun is doing what I did a few weekends ago–going to see a tribute band and dancing in front of the stage with friends…Amy was one of them and we dragged her out there.

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As a child my grandma said, “Amy (me) you only need one good friend.  That’s all.”  I did not believe her.  It did not make sense at all in my junior high mind.

Many years later I had a similar conversation with a woman in our church.  I said, “I need seven friends.”  She started laughing.  I said, “No I’m dead serious.  I need at least seven.”   I need my own army.

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I cannot speak for other extrovert stay at home moms, but the hardest thing for me is just that–staying at home.  I might have a little more tolerance for kids constantly in my space compared to my introvert friends.  I gladly welcome my kids’ friends over, I love watching other people’s kids, and I enjoy having people stopping by.  

Back when I had a preschooler, toddler, and baby I had major cabin fever.  I craved adult conversation.  It was hard to go out back then.  I found even just a run to the grocery store gave me a small boost of energy.  Sometimes I would find myself talking to the UPS man or randomly wanting to call someone on the phone for no reason.  

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The idea of walking around in pajamas all day and reading a book sounds wearing to me…honestly it makes me feel gross.  

My kids are completely used to my need to run around.  Everyday my son asks   “Where are we going today?”  

I am not a homebody.  Which would make homeschooling hard for me if we ever decided to go that route.  I love sending my children off to school and being a part of our Christian school community.  I tend to be a “joiner” when it comes to church, school, and moms group events.  Back when my children were very little, I had to sit out on a lot on these events.  That was draining.

Introvert or extrovert, I am forever grateful God made us both.  We can learn to understand one another.  The introvert can once in awhile get off her chair and dance to the Police tribute band where the extrovert can learn to shut off the music, grab a book, and stay in on a Friday night.

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2 thoughts on “Extroverted stay at home mom

  1. Thanks I needed to read this. I have twin boy/girl 3&half year olds. I’m a Full Time Stay at Home MNom! Its been a VERY long winter here in Ohio. I’m so the extrovert, I need people!!! I’m 36 yrs old. In Spring Summer & fall, everyday I’d take kids outta house… PreSchool, church, Library, YMCA, community, parks, playdates…. I value community learning for my kids & I NEED to be around people, watching, talking, admiring!! I am soo stir crazy right now. Snow piled high all around our house, too cold for kids to be out; its even too cold to walk outta car into somewhere. I try to read, my mind’s buzzing of things to do, which some of those things are not priority. Thanks for your thoughts that I can soo relate to.

    • I wish you lived closer because I would love to hand out with you! I’ve also found it helpful to work out at the gym once and be around people. And I am in a Book Club this year and that’s been a good outlet too.

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