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Tag Archives: blogging

It has been almost two years since I started Everyday Mom.  At the time I was bursting with “mom ideas” and had post after post written long before I launched the blog.  Now the time I spend blogging and reading blogs is significantly less.  

I can’t even come up with a good picture for this post.

Why is that?  I have seen the trend in other moms too.  The kids grow older and go off to school.  Our “me time” should increase, right?  It does not seem to work that way.  Here’s a few theories…

My younger kids do not always nap.  I take advantage of that and do afternoon outings to the park, running errands, the indoor playground etc. so I can spend the morning cleaning, answering e-mails, working on church related things.  I like the freedom of not having to rush home for naps.  I am more relaxed.  

Even if they have “quiet time” in their rooms, it is an hour at the most.  Even though I can get work done while they play, ride bikes outside, or watch TV–they are kids.  They need me to switch the channel on the TV, fasten a bike helmet, and sometimes break up a conflict.  It is very difficult to focus on a task like writing with multiple interruptions.  As I am blogging this right now, my kids are all out with my husband and the house is totally quiet.  This is a rare occurrence.  I probably would not be writing this blog post if they were home.

My other theory is I wake up insane hours in the morning so I can get my exercise in.  I love the morning workouts.  I am not a natural morning person and more of a night owl.  I truly believe you can train yourself to be one or the other with time and patience.  So when 10 PM rolls around (and sometimes even earlier!) I am done.  Anything I write is not going to make any sense.

My last theory is I read more.  I have read almost as many books this year as my husband so far in 2013.  I also try to read at least half of the newspaper each day.  I also read Runners World cover to cover.

I see frantic parents running around, checking their cell phones in a frenzy and over planning and over committing.  I have been in that trap before. I think I have done a pretty good job in the last year of staying out of it.

So while I was considering the future of Everyday Mom, I was questioning where I want this blog to go.  My zeal for constantly sharing “mom ideas” and reading 10-15 blog posts a day is not what it was.  I still need an outlet to share, to post some “mom ideas,” and connect with some of you.  So you will still see me here.  My time blogging and even being sucked into the Internet is significantly less…and that’s a good thing..

 

 

 


Some people make a New Years resolution to lose weight.  My husband’s resolution was to make a new dessert every week.  I told him since he was taking the time to try brand new recipes and take pictures of every single one (and I still laugh when my nephew said–”Why do you have all these pictures of food on your computer?) he really ought to create a blog.

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So Weekend Dessert is officially launched.  You will find some gourmet delicious desserts on it.  I have always been a hot fudge sundae type person.  My husband has helped me expand my horizons.

 


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I was always jealous of the families who took off to Florida or Alabama EVERY Spring Break.  Well we’re a traveling family, but this Spring Break we’re staying put.  My kids are SO excited for the week when I shared with them my “theme day” idea.

I have a new respect for preschool teachers.  Planning theme days and activities for three kids for one week was time consuming.  I cannot imagine doing this everyday!  I still have to look for some craft ideas.

I may blog about some our Spring Break activities, but here is a basic map of our week.  Our plans could change based on friend’s availability.  We were going to try to connect with some friends during the week off as well.

Monday:  Play Day–go to the indoor playground (or outdoor weather depending) and play board games.

Tuesday:  Nature Day–go on a hike (weather depending), do a nature related craft, make a “God’s Creation” collage.  Maybe watch Bug’s Life?

Wednesday:  Treasure Hunt Day–apparently I am making a big treasure hunt all over the yard and church parking lot.  The oldest wants it to extend all the way to the park, but that might be pushing it.

Thursday:  Kid’s Choice Day–the kids REALLY want to go swimming.  So we will go to an indoor aquatic center.  They also LOVE going out for frozen yogurt.DSC08181

Friday:  Downtown Day–we used to go downtown every Friday when we only had one child.  The kids love to take the bus (kind of a nuisance it only runs every hour), go to the library, get bread from Great Harvest, go to Starbucks (well that would mostly me) or get pretzels at the mall.

Saturday:  Keeping it open as or right now.  Would love to take my oldest roller skating unsure if the gym that hosts roller skating nights will be open.

Sunday:  EASTER!


My parents (my dad especially) often ask me to share something funny one of my kids have said.  They live on the other side of the country so we only see them a few times a year.  I am always reminded that I need to write about what they say.  Now I don’t want this to turn into a cutesy–”look how adorable my kids are and I think you should think so too” blog.  But I do want to post more of our day to day occurrences.

Conversation with my son at breakfast about career choices:

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” – Me

“Three things.  I want to be a news reporter in the morning.  A swim instructor in the afternoon.  And a builder at night.” – Son

“Wow, three things!  When will you spend time with your wife?” – Me

“Never!” – Son

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DSC07700Some people enjoy the sounds of bird calls or a flowing stream.  Some are soothed by new age music or the white noise from a fan.  I am relaxed by the sounds of children playing–engrossed in their own “Little People World.”

DSC07703My son enjoys playing with his friend who hangs out with us between kindergarten and when her mom gets out of work in the early afternoon.  It is fun to have another child in the house. Derek enjoys playing with her so much.

DSC07704Today their Little People game was also enjoyed by our cat who looks a little spooky in this picture.  She really is a sweet cat and puts up with all children–even the ones who try to pick her up and use her as a pillow.


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As much as people will tell you that Christmas letters are old-fashioned are should be replaced with e-cards and Facebook messages, don’t believe them!  I think everyone enjoys going to their mailbox during the holiday season and receiving cards, letters, and photos from all over the country from friends and relatives.  We love wall papering our fridge in December with photos and we have saved every single Christmas letter from friends and family since 2003!

I realize not everyone likes to write.  Putting together a Christmas letter might give you the same anxiety you received when your English teacher asked you to write in your creative writing journal on a topic of her choosing.  You don’t have to be a published author.  Here are few tips from me–a very amateur writer–but who loves a good Christmas letter.

1)  Start with a good lead.  In this age of texting, Twitter, and Facebook statuses, we all have short attention spans.  People read the first few sentences of an article and if it doesn’t pull them in–they move on.  Not to say they are going to junk your Christmas letter.  However, they will be enticed by some interesting beginning words.  Start with a story, a good quote, or something sentimental.  Avoid clichés like “Where did the time go?” or “It’s that time of year to write the typical Christmas letter.”

2)  Keep it short.  One page maybe two at the most is a good length.  Don’t tell your life story.  Write a memoir instead.  Write your first draft without being too concerned about length.  Then go back and cut out the least important parts.

3)  Don’t say negative things about your spouse/kids!  If your six-year-old is struggling in spelling or eight year old scored zero goals in soccer or your twelve-year-old has a crush on the principal’s daughter–don’t say it in a Christmas letter!  You think you would never do it, I know!  Sometimes we resort to teasing to create humor.  Often we don’t realize we look kind of silly and usually lose respect from the ones we love.

4)  Don’t let it read like a grid.  Writing what you did each month of the year is a great idea.  I have written many Christmas letters with this type of theme.  But make sure it doesn’t read like, “And then we did this…and then we went here.”  It helps to use different verbs and keep sentences to the point.

5)  Keep it real.  Some people criticize letters because they can be…well…a little fake.  You had a great year, really?  Didn’t you lose your job?  Unless you are sending a letter to just a close select few, don’t go into detail about your problems.  Share what happened especially if it was significant (someone dying, husband serving in Afghanistan, being diagnosed with a disease…).  You could even thank your friends for their support and prayers.  Think about it. If you send a Christmas letter to your old college roommate and your only contact is the annual Christmas letter, do they need to know this?  Ask yourself:  Why do they need to know this if I didn’t tell them when I was going through it?

And if you really don’t want to write the annual Christmas letter, ask someone else to do it!  One year we got a family letter written by the twelve-year-old in the family and it was precious.   Or have each family member write a paragraph.  Just make it fun!


The trees in my backyard at dusk

The trees in my backyard at dusk

It is the first Sunday of Advent.  My husband preached from Job 38:1-11 this morning about how Jesus has to come to release creation from the curse of sin.  This is God’s vast beautiful world and it is on its way to renewal.  I enjoy this amazing creation right in my backyard–these three beautiful trees I LOVE.

“God doesn’t create junk and He doesn’t junk what He created.”  - Al Wolters.


I recently returned from the Defined by God Conference for pastor’s wives late Saturday.  It was in beautiful, warm, and sunny San Diego.  A little bit of temperature and “sun” shock coming from the rainy blustery Pacific Northwest.

In 2012 I have been a bit of a conference junkie.  I went to a youth ministry conference in January, a conference for small churches in February, and a writer’s conference in April.  Each of these conferences was influential (and very beneficial!) in that compartment in my life (youth ministry, church ministry, writing).

This conference was more than just training to be a more effective pastor’s wife.  For me it was a time of healing, conviction, and facing some of my own struggles head on in every area of my life.

There is so much I gained from this conference (including some new friendships!) that I could easily write 100 blog posts about it.  One of the things that keeps resonating in my head was shared by the speaker in the last session, Amy Groeschel  who shared about balance.

She read from Psalm 23, one of the first passages I memorized as a five-year old.  The all too familiar words have been on my heart ever since I left the conference.  “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.”

Groeschel says, “God provides all our needs.  We don’t need more time.  We have everything we need to do what God asks.”

It seems like when people ask me how I am doing or when I ask others how their day is going we talk about how busy we are.  We get in a long spiel of everything we have to do, every place we need to drive our kids, and every unfinished project.

Groeschel says “we need to fight to need God and not rely on our own flesh.”  We need to ask the Lord how we should spend our free time.  We need to seek the Lord about everything else from kid’s activities to new careers.  We have EVERYTHING we need.  We don’t need more time, more friends, more stuff, or more money to do what God has asked us today.  He is our rock.  He is our source and our power.  Let us seek Him first.

 


Maybe you have been there.  Maybe you are there right now.  Your mind races.  Constant swirling thoughts.  It is difficult if not impossible to focus.  You become edgy, irritable, or perhaps you retreat.  Maybe getting out of bed is hard.  Maybe playing with your kids takes effort.  Maybe you feel constantly distracted.  Maybe your life is a bunch of unfinished projects and tasks.  Maybe doing the normal things like laundry or making lunch for the kids feels overwhelming.  Your fears might be irrational.  Your feelings overpower everything.

Anxiety.  Depression.  Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  So common.  Many of us face these.

When I was walking through a dark period, I tried to find some type of on-line support group.  I was surprised to find very little, if anything.

You show up to church and it is easy to share about the family member fighting cancer or the friend who broke her leg.  But what the mom trapped in depression?  Or the friend who is struggling with panic attacks?  Much harder to talk about.

They are diseases too.  Just like my friend with diabetes has to check her insulin or my friend with heart disease has to take his medication, I need to check my anxiety.  Daily.  I need to deal with it in healthy constructive ways so I can live a normal, healthy life as a wife and mom.

I am creating an online support group which will be a closed facebook group called The “Off Switch” group.  Together we can help shut off those racing, swirling thoughts that make us overwhelmed and cause us to panic.  Or make us feel depressed.  These type of negative thoughts are at the root of why we feel and react the way we do.

If you are someone who struggles with anxiety, depression, and/or obsessive compulsive disorder, I invite you to join.  Simply send me an e-mail at everyday-mom@hotmail.com or leave a comment with your e-mail address.  You need to be on Facebook and friends with me so I can add you to the group.  If you are friends with me already on Facebook, simply send me a private message.

A few guidelines if you want to join…

1)  You must commit to posting at least once a month.  Facebook groups do not work if people do not stay active.  And please show the courtesy of informing others if you choose to leave the group.

2)  No bashing spouses, children, in-laws, or extended family.  It is OK to share you are having marital/family struggles.  Choose your words carefully.

3)  Only use words that will build one another up.  This is a SUPPORT group.

4)  The group is a closed Facebook group which means only group members will see your posts.

I hope you will join me on this journey.  You’re not alone.  I am right there with you fighting every day.


The first thing I noticed on my first “Going Dark” day was that my morning ran smoother.  I teach a story hour for 12-14 preschoolers one morning a month.  I have to get us out the door by 9:15 AM.  We were all ready to go by 8:45.  I actually had extra time to tackle some other items off my “to-do” list.  It was smooth and easygoing transition out the door and we do not always have that.

The day itself was a little atypical as I watched a toddler all day on top of my own three children.  I also watch a kindergartener for two hours in the afternoon.  The only stressful time was getting everyone ready for lunch, cleaning up the kitchen and eating area, and getting the younger ones down from naps.  Honestly that was a very tempting time to go on and check e-mail and facebook.  I think I turn to these as a stress relief when my day gets more chaotic.

In the afternoon I found myself getting more accomplished I have thrown to the wayside the last few weeks.  For instance there were over 400 photos on my memory card and not a single one edited or put on my computer.  I started this project and completed it.  I also finished a book, got some laundry completed, thank-you notes sent out for my daughter’s birthday, book orders for school completed, Hot Lunch menu filled out, and an article for the church newsletter written.  Normally I probably would have gotten some of that done, but not all of it.

The hardest time not using the Internet was after the kids go to bed.  I missed reading blogs, surfing Pinterest, and responding to e-mails.  I was too tired to do anything productive.  I managed to finish editing photos and start another book.

As I got back on the Internet today I saw only a few e-mails I had to return and no earth shattering facebook messages.  Which convinces me I do not need to be on the computer near as much as I previously was.



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