Are we as moms too busy? And what is the cause? Is it because we need to be “plugged in” all the time i.e. cell phones, facebook, e-mail? Is it a sign of a times? Is it our personalities?
I think a safe answer to all these questions is “yes.”
I looked back at the times in my life as a mom where I had way too much out on my plate such as Fall of 2010 when I had a kindergartener, older toddler, and younger toddler. I was training for a marathon, taking veterinary technology classes, on MOPS leadership, not to mention some church involvements. From the outside I looked like I was juggling everything well: I PRed on the marathon, I got decent grades in class, I enjoyed MOPS leadership etc. However, I was constantly on edge especially at home.
There were sacrifices and unfortunately it was the ones I love who paid. By Christmas I was falling apart. Denial is very powerful and I was stuck in it for a long time.
I truly believe God created us differently. We each have our capacity of what we can handle at what given time.
I looked back on those times and thought about how my actions and behaviors were the result of too busy of a schedule. What did that look like? This is what I came up with…
1) I get into the “ministry martyr mindset” such as: ”No one cares.” ”No one wants to help me.” and/or blaming multiple people. Usually this means it is time to resign, take a long break, or re-evaluate and make some changes.
2) I am using blogs, Pinterest, facebook, TV, etc. as a way to escape the stresses of my life especially when I should be using my time to do other things.
3) I’m always talking about how busy I am or sharing my schedule with multiple people.
4) I take on something because I feel if I don’t, it will fall apart or worse I don’t feel someone can do as well of a job as me.
5) Multiple people express concern about my schedule or tell me I am too busy. Especially my husband or close friends.
6) I am not taking care of myself: spending time in the Word, praying, reading for pleasure goes to the bottom of the priority list unintentionally.
7) Projects are only getting half done or extra clutter is laying around the house.
8) I commit to going to an event and then back out at the last minute because I’m too tired.
9) The things clogging my schedule feel like “extra stuff” and things I am not overly passionate about or don’t enjoy.
10) Filling my schedule with commitments becomes more of an addiction and “my need” versus meeting the needs for someone or something else.
11) I am short tempered or easily annoyed by my husband and spouse. If they see me as a frantic person that is not giving them the quality and quantity time they need and deserve.
12) I tell someone, “Yes I can do that,” and it never really seems to get done.
13) My cell phone/e-mail/i pad or other form of technology has more control over my life and relationships than what it should. If I constantly feel the need to push my kids aside to check my e-mail.
14) I am getting headaches, stomach aches, or shaky arms due to stress.
15) I dread getting up in the morning.
These are my own personal warning signs. Finding that balance of commitments is truly an art!